So today, someone that I met through my ex is getting married to his fiancee. When they first set a date, I was still with my fiancee and we were actually planning on attending the wedding together, it was three days before I was originally supposed to leave for boot camp (yea that's another paragraph further down). They're tying the knot and saying I do today and even though I know that I made the right decision to end my relationship, but it's kind of bittersweet to know that they're going to have that forever happiness with each other and I'm still having to wait. It's by choice that I'm single now, and I'm okay with that, but it still kinda sucks that I'm not the one getting my forever happy ending. I was so excited about getting married, I was going to have my perfect wedding, the day that every girl dreams about at some point in her life, and I gave it up.
I'm jealous, honestly. They got engaged after I did and they were going to be married over a year sooner than I was. It didn't seem fair to me, that I had to wait, mostly because of my parents wanting me to, but also because the military situation was going to keep me from being able to live with my husband after we got married. But they were going to be able to get married and live happily ever after pretty much immediately. But that's the curse of following my dream and joining the military. I'm never going to have the perfect dream life that I dreamed about when I was a civilian. That's just not possible anymore for me, which is probably another reason why my engagement fell apart. But there's no use dwelling on the fact that I was supposed to be at this wedding with my fiancee and now I'm in Gulfport, Mississippi, alone and single. I made my choice.
On the boot camp note, my original ship date for the Navy was January 7, 2014. That's this coming Tuesday. It's just plain weird to think that if I hadn't gotten beyond lucky, I would still be sitting in Atlanta, Georgia waiting to leave for boot camp. I wouldn't have gone through boot camp with the people or RDC's that I had, I wouldn't have had the A School friends that I had or instructors/sponsors. I wouldn't have made the friends that I have today and I probably wouldn't be going to Bahrain with those people or at all. I wouldn't know anyone that I do know and I can't imagine my life without these people anymore. I can't imagine being a civilian anymore, the Navy is the right life for me. I'm almost done with my schooling, and about to head off to my next big adventure. I'm happy, crazy and living my life the way that I decide is right for me, not what other people expect me to do. It's an insane adventure and I'm ready for the ride.
Your reminiscing crazy MA
Victoria :*
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